May Cause Cancer
by Girl.La.Disco
Summary: So here we are, like every other day of our lives. Slaving at work and putting up with pretentious customers, lusting after people and making stupid decisions. I’m all work and little play. But he’s all play and little work.
1. Chapter 1

Title: May Cause Cancer

Story Summary: So here we are, like every other day of our lives. Slaving at work and putting up with pretentious customers, lusting after people and making stupid decisions. I'm all work and little play. But he's all play and little work.

Chapter one: Cigarettes and Soundtracks

Chapter Summary: I remember grinding with Axel and Demyx thinking that things could only get better from here. Boy was I wrong.

Rating: M just in case

Warnings: Language, Sexual themes, Slight Violence, partial Nudity, AU

Notes: I do not own Kingdom hearts. I simply borrowed the characters for this. By the way if you are interested in Beta Reading, I am looking for a Beta Reader to help me in this project. Let me know if you want to.

So here we are, like every other day of our lives. Slaving at work and putting up with pretentious customers, lusting after people and making stupid decisions. I'm all work and little play. But he's all play and little work. It funny how things have changed but they stay the same throughout the course of it. The only thing that's really changed is I've moved out and my mom doesn't call me anymore. I am the same person, and for the most part we have the same relationship as well. I wonder how we've grown. I'm still five feet three and he's still six feet tall. We have different friends but in the end we are still friends and go to each other with our problems.

Axel says we've changed but I don't really get it. Image that, I over analyze things but I'm the one who doesn't understand how we've changed. We still so grab Venti green tea lemonades from Starbucks and walk by the river. I'll spew my philosophical bull shit and he'll laugh at me. We have the same old jokes and slowly are making new ones. It's funny how our relationship progressed. We simply moved from hanging out at school to hanging out at work now. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. We've had our ups and downs but I still care and I'm sure he still cares.

I love Axel, but not in the sexual sense. We are merely two friends who happen to have different sexual preferences. But this isn't explaining things how I wanted to. I guess I should find a better way to do this. Maybe we should go back to the beginning. As I shift around on my bed and reach for my C.D's; the person I'm with sits up and gives me a funny look.

"What are you doing Roxas?" he asks as he rubs his eyes. I push Sora back down on the bed and fish underneath it for what I'm looking for. I pull it out and smile a bit. Sora looks at me and grabs what I'm holding. He looks at it and smiles. I crawl over him to get to my lap top. I open the case and look at the C.D for a bit. The previously mentioned redhead gave it to me as a birthday present. I pop it out of 

the case and look at the disc for a moment. On it is scribbled _Soundtrack: Ela, Axel, and Roxie_; I shake my head.

"I hate it when he calls me that." I wrinkle my nose and Sora laughs. He grabs the C.D. and sticks it into my lap top. Sora ruffles my hair and clicks the C.D. on. We lay down on the bed, Sora for music; I for the memories.

_**Hold on Tightly Let go Lightly – Boys Night Out**_

__I first met Axel when I transferred into advanced English. I changed class to get into a different history class. My history teacher and I were having our differences, so I asked to change classees. I had to show up early, since I needed to get the work I had missed from the previous week. I went down a one row and sat at the back of the class. Before the bell rang three people walked in and stood in front of where I was sitting. I had my head down, looking over my assignments when a hand pushed the sheets down. I looked up and I saw him. The tall cocky red head gave me a smirk and put his hand on my shoulder.

"You're in my seat, but since you're so cute I'll let you have it," His voice was sort of sweet and a bit cocky. I shook my head and smiled at him. The teacher told us we would be reading all period, which meant a social period. Axel took the seat in front of me, turning around to talk to me. The people he had come in with were friends of mine. Kairi was a sweet girl, a bit pushy and had a bit of a habit of lying; Luxord is a tall blonde boy with a bit of a gambling problem (he is really funny and a lot of fun). I smile as Kairi turned around and started talking to Luxord. Axel starting talking to me and I knew we had something. Axel and I liked the same music, had the same interests and made the same grades. We were a funny kind of pair and we had just met.

At the end of class Axel asked me where I was going. I told him I had to go to Home Ec. and he smiled. He took my hand and asked if he could walk me there. I got flustered and told him I wasn't gay.

He sighed, "Figures."

He walked me anyways. After that I spent class alone; my best friend had graduated last year so now I really didn't have many people to talk to. I worked quietly in my Home Ec. class, now people always wonder why I took that class. I figured that one day I would need to know how to cook and knowing how to sew would be useful for me. On top of that it would be an easy class and a good place to meet girls. After Home Ec. I called up Sora and asked him if he wanted to go for lunch-I had a third period spare.

I stepped outside to meet up with Sora; it was break so tons of other students were outside. I put a cigarette in my mouth and lit it. After a few minutes, Sora pulled up and we went to lunch. Sora was my best friend. I was going to move out with him this summer, after I graduated. If we weren't together, we were texting or talking on msn. That's just how Sora and I were. I jumped into his car and off we went.

After lunch I got settled into my new history class. I sat down at the table that the teacher directed me to and waited for class to start. A few minutes after the bell went and we had gotten settled into class the door was thrown open. In strutted the same redhead from my morning English class. He sat down beside me and smirked.

"So we meet again,"

"I guess so." After that I was stuck with him. He drove me home from school that day and when I went to leave the next day for school he was waiting out there to pick me up. We were comfortable with each other. The red head didn't have to try to be friends with me and I didn't have to try either. Don't get me wrong, Sora-was and always would be-my best friend, the two of us had simply always been friends and we always would be. But Axel and I fit like puzzle pieces. We had met and it was like we simply knew we would always be there for each other.

In the first few days I got to know a lot about Axel, as him with me. I learned that Axel had just moved to Hallow Bastion from a small place called Twilight Town. He lived on the outskirts of town on a farm with his parents. When he told his parents that he was gay they had kicked him out. He moved to Hallow Bastion to live with his aunt. I told him how I lived here all my life with my single mom. I told him that me and my father fought a lot and didn't get along at all. He figured it was probably better that we were both in our current situations. I liked spending time with Axel.

After a week or two it was safe to say Axel and I were a constant pair. We were hardly seen apart at school, minus our different classes. Axel came over for supper a lot, my mom simply loved him. He was so alive and full of life, it was a nice change in our small apartment. Sora loved having Axel around as well. The three of us made quite a team. We ran around showing Axel all the fun things to do around town. We took Axel to basement shows and moshed. We took him to our favourite places and showed him things that only Sora and I shared. Of course we had kept some of our places for just us. But Axe didn't mind, he knew that Sora and I were friends for quite some time, and we needed certain things to be between just us.

Axel made our Duo into a Trio. But even being a trio Sora and I were still a Duo when we went out just us two. When Axel and I went out just the two of us we were also a duo.

It was like Axel belonged with us, especially with me.

_**Bad Reputation - Joan Jett**_

__The rest of September fell past in a haze of school work, basement shows, job searches, alcohol and cigarettes. I never said we were perfect angels now did I? Being with Axel was almost like needing to breathe for me. It simply always was. Of course school life had taken a drastic change and I could no longer find female dates; though the number of males interested in me had spiked dramatically. This is the point where he'd tell me to shut up and I wasn't missing out on much by not dating girls. Then I'd tell him he wasn't missing much since he didn't like girls but I was missing out on a lot.

Axel and I had a lot of strange conversations. They would make either of us rather uncomfortable, till we hit each other and laughed about it. Half of the time we spent at school was outside smoking. Sora couldn't come and get me for lunch very often; he had finally gotten off his lazy bum and gotten himself a job. Axels' behaviour was a strange thing. The red head walked me to class, or forced me to walk him. He said he had to drive me to and from school simply to spend more time with me. He held my hand often, if not all the time. And do you think he changed the way he acted if front of my mom? No, we still held hands and were goofy teenagers. She didn't even think twice about it. The start of October had been the start of some of our strangest conversations.

"Axel?" I said with a slightly questioning tone. The red head looked over at me and passed me the cigarette we were sharing. Apparently around Twilight town it didn't get cold till the end of December. So here we were, in the first few days of October and he had only worn a tee-shirt to school. The red head was holding me against him as we smoked outside, claiming he only wanted my body heat.

"What is it Rox?" He looked down at me as I took a drag of the cigarette. The nicotine filled my lungs, giving me a slight buzz.

"Are you trying to sleep with me?" He quirked an eyebrow at me. I heard a few people near me whisper about my comment and I tucked my head down. As if we didn't already seem gay enough. I fidget around a bit and he tightens his arm around my waist. I take another drag of the cigarette and hand it back to him.

"Roxas don't ask stupid questions. I'm freezing my ass off, the last thing I'm thinking about is trying to plow you," He took a long drag of the cigarette and blew the smoke in my face. I wiggle my nose and he smiles.

"But you have thought about it?" I questioned him a bit more. He passed the cigarette back to me. I started to inhale the remains of our cigarette, sharing is so much faster. But then he said something that made me choke.

"Of Course," I pushed him off me as he laughed. He tripped over his own feet and fell on his ass. I laughed and took a drag of the cigarette. He looked up at me and gave me his goofy grin. I smirked down at him and exhale smoke.

"You just looked so cool," He said and stood up. I dropped the butt of the cigarette and stepped on it to make sure it was out. He went to take my hand for us to walk back inside but I slapped it away.

"And you looked so Gay sitting on your ass like that," I remember laughing and running back into the school. He chased after me and we laughed until a teacher caught us. Axel got scolded since I was one of the teacher's favourite students. We didn't bring the subject up again for quite a while, I thought about it a lot though. So now that I knew Axel did think of me in a sexual way. The only problem was well there really wasn't one. He knew I didn't return the same kind of feelings and that was where we left it for the time being. I talked to Sora about it but he couldn't think of anything I could do 

at the time either. I didn't stop hanging out with Axel though; it was almost as if I couldn't. We had simply moved on from the strange conversation.

The next thing I can recall was the Halloween party we went to. Sora's new buddy from work was throwing one and the guy had insisted he meet us. I had dressed as a fifties greaser and Axel was a thirties styled mobster. Sora's friend was pretty cool. His name was Riku and to this day he and Sora are still friends. The party had started out slow, just a few people, but around nine or so more people had starting showing up along with more alcohol. Safe to say by eleven I was pretty well on my way to being really drunk. Axel had promised he would stay sober through the night, simply because he had to drive me home. I don't remember getting home though.

I do remember waking up with a splitting headache and in nothing but my Boxers. When I had opened my eyes I freaked out because Axel was there, only wearing his boxers as well. He calmed me down quickly and explained everything. He had brought me home because I was drunk. He took off my clothes because I had asked him too. Which I could see. I knew from previous experiences I hated wearing clothes once I got a few drinks in me. After He'd help me strip I'd passed out and he went to sleep. I trusted him, which in turn his story was confirmed by my mom. She had watched him help me the whole time, and had even helped herself.

"Roxie, you should be Gay." I had dropped the dish I was holding when Axel made this statement mid November. I turned around and gave him a really strange look. You know when you smell something really terrible and you screw up your face? That was about what my face looked like. Before I regained my composer he started talking again.

"Well everyone at school already thinks you are and you'd make a really great guy for someone," He stated. I bit my lip and looked at him. I really couldn't believe he had just told me that.

"Yeah, no thanks to you," I said and put my hands on the counter behind me. I knew I should have picked up the dish, but hell it was a plastic cup. It would survive being on the floor for a bit. Axel got out of his chair and walked over to me. He covered my hands with his and smirked down at me, like the cocky red head he was.

"I could teach you everything I know," I pulled my hands out from under his and ducked under his arm to get away. I picked up the cup and threw it into the sink before heading over to my cigarettes, which were laying on the kitchen table.

"Axel you know," but the red head cut me off.

"Yeah I know; but you can't blame a guy for trying hey?" I smiled a bit and lit the cigarette in my mouth. Truth was I had been turned down a few days ago, and I had told the girl the exact same thing. He knew it too, that's probably why he said it.

"Tell you what, if I ever decide to try it, you'll be the first person I come to," He smiled. We both thought at that time I would never even consider it. Now it wasn't that I was against it, I just knew it 

wasn't me. I liked girls and even though I knew I could find the same kind of comfort in Axel, I couldn't have those kinds of feelings for him. But that didn't bother either of us for a while. Axel was a great friend and not someone I was willing to lose. We understood that, and it was simply how it was meant to be.

Little did I know that I would soon need Axels' comfort in a much bigger way.

_**How to Save a Life – The Fray **_

The day that changed my life had started out like every other day. I wish it hadn't though; maybe there would have been a sign that way. I had gotten out of bed, late like normal. I'd thrown on a pair of jeans and a tee-shirt. I threw my phone into my pocket and pulled a warm hoodie on. My mom passed me two pieces of toast as I walked out the door. One for me and one for Axel. I gave him a piece of toast as I jumped into Axel's car.

"Give your mom my thanks I didn't grab breakfast," He put it into his mouth and I laughed. Axel had made it a habit to call me as he drove to my house and request, or demand toast. Axel and I haven't hung out for a while, and if we did, it was either at school or at work. Axel had finally found a job, so now he didn't have to bum cigarettes off of me all the time. Ironic that only a week before he got the job he was complaining that we didn't get to spend enough time together.

We had got to school and the day was passing quickly. I sat down at our lunch spot in the hallway we had claimed as ours. Axel sat down beside me and put his arm around my shoulders. I rolled my eyes and started eating my salad.

"You look cold Roxie," He said and I shrugged. We had sat there for a few minutes before saying anything. It wasn't either of us that spoke either. It was Olette. Good god she was the most amazing girl on this earth. She was a soulful, indie brunette. She was holding a c.d case out to me, a smile on her face. Damn I felt like I was in heaven, it didn't matter that Axel was sitting right beside me, holding me and glaring at the poor girl.

"Thanks for lending me this, it was wicked. I hope you don't mind that I ripped the songs onto my computer," She handed over the c.d and I took it from the girl. She smiled and put her headphones on. I watched her walk away from us and sighed. Axel grabbed the c.d from my hands and laughed.

"I'll just be throwing this out," I grabbed the c.d back and smacked Axel in the forehead with it. He laughed at how silly I was bieng about this. I was so hopelessly in love with Olette. She was probably one of the only people in the school who still believed I was straight. Axel was about to say some sort of smart ass comment when the school intercom came on.

"Will Roxas Hart please report to the main office,"

Axel shot me a funny look and I shrugged. I hadn't done anything wrong as of today, I didn't really get why I was being called down to the office. I grabbed my bag and stood up. It went without saying that Axel followed me there. I got there and the secretary gave us a funny look. She said I should 

probably go into the office alone. Axel merely shrugged and sat in one of the chairs to wait for me. I walked into the principal's office and sat down. Cid gave me a sinister look. Now don't get me wrong he was a great principal but he had a certain way of being really frank with all the students.

"Your mother has been in an accident at work," That sentence killed me inside. He explained what he knew and asked if I needed a ride to the hospital. I told him that Axel would take me and he nodded.

The next few hours were a blur to me. Axel had driven me to the hospital and I found out what had happened to her. She had been taking apart a machine to fix it. Something had come loose as she worked and fell on top of her. They were only giving her till the end of the night to live. I remember sitting in the chair beside her bed the whole time. Axel had went to my house and called my aunt's. He returned later. After a few hours of waiting my aunt's had showen up as well. I remember thinking to myself that this was all a horrible dream, that I would wake up and everything would be fine. Axel had stayed with me the whole time.

It was about two in the morning when it had started to hit me. We were all crowded in the small room watching my mom sleep. Then she had started gasping. I had thought for a moment that she was waking up but I realized how much pain she was in. The doctor and two nursed had come rushing in. They were asking us what we wanted to do. No one seemed to be able to make a decision. I was silent for most of the conversation, my eyes locked on her as she struggled to breathe.

"Pull the plug," My aunts gasped in horror. The room was quiet before they started to protest. I shook my head and looked at Axel. They had wanted him to leave all night, but I simply wouldn't let him. I needed Axel there, more than I needed anyone. The doctor turned to me and told me it was my choice. I nodded and told him to do it. My aunt's tried to get me to leave the room, but I wouldn't go.

Axel slipped his arms around my shoulders and held me against his chest. I stood there and waited while she gasped and tried to hold on to life. Her last breathe seemed like it took an hour even if it was only a few moments. When she was pronounced dead I let myself fall apart. My aunt's told Axel to take me home so I could get some rest. They said they would take care of the funeral plans.

The funeral was a week before we got out for Christmas break. It was cold and bitter outside, reminding me of how I felt on the inside. I simply felt like there was nothing left. Sora and Axel were both there for me at the funeral. They were in the family room with me, and sat next to me in the front row.

I had a certain hate for Christmas this year. I hadn't returned to school since my mom's accident. I had been aloud till the start of the New Year off of school. Axel was suppose to go back home for the holidays, but he didn't. I remember spending Christmas sitting on the couch. We exchanged our gifts and ate left over Chinese food. He had brought over movies and we simply sat and existed, like it was any other day of the year. I didn't want it to be Christmas; it was my mom's favourite holiday.

I remember half way through watching Austin Powers I finally broke down. I cried through the rest of the movie. Axel didn't say anything; he just held me and watched the movie. I cried until I fell asleep. Axel had held me all night.

_**Life – Our Lady Peace**_

When the New Year started, I started up again. It was really hard. I had too much to do. The way it broke down was I had an apartment I didn't want to be in, with furniture that reminded me of my mom. Everything in the apartment reminded me of her. I sold most of it, only keeping sentimental things. Whatever wasn't sold was donated. My land lord had asked me if I was going to move out. I said yes. Now it was the simple matter of with whom.

Most people thought Axel to be the oblivious choice, that or Sora. Axel was great; we had a lot of fun and got along well. There were defiantly upsides to living with him; being able to smoke in the apartment, being able to drink more than Sora would let me. But then there was tension between me and Axel. I knew he had a certain amount of feelings for me, but we had talked about that. We had our awkward moments still. I thought it would be much to stressful, but it looked like my only choice.

Then Sora had called me. He and Riku were going to move in together, he asked me if I wanted to move in with them. I weighted my pros and cons. Sora was my best friend. He understood me and could handle me no matter what mood I was in. Axel didn't have that experience yet. I had to smoke in my room or outside, but that wasn't too bad. I didn't know Riku very well, but from what I heard he was a pretty chilled out kind of person. Rent between three people was cheaper than rent between two.

In the end I decided to move in with Sora and Riku. When I told Axel he was pissed of at me. He wanted to know why I had picked them over him, especially since I hardly knew Riku.

I remember the conversation so vividly. We were sitting on the kitchen floor of mine and my mom's old apartment. I was ready to move out, all my stuff was packed and everything that had been sold and donated was gone. We had an ashtray sitting on the floor, and we were sharing it. I smoked a lot more at that time. It was something about all the stress I was going through.

"Why Rox? It just doesn't make sense! I am your best friend, you should live with me!" He was angry and hurt. I could see it in his face. It hurt me too, to know I had caused that pain and frustration.

"Axel, I already explained why, it cheaper and closer to work and school," He made this hissing noise. Like a cat ready to rip your face clean off.

"So you're just going to ditch me?! For what?"

"Fuck you Axel! I've known Sora for eight years, he is one of the most important people in my life," I pulled the cigarette back to my mouth and took a long drag.

"What about me?" I closed my eyes and rubbed the bridge of my nose. I could not do this right now. Here were Axel's feelings for me bubbling up again. It was hard to deal with. I cared about the guy so much, but I knew I couldn't give him what he wanted.

"Axel," I snapped to bring him back to reality. I took another drag of my cigarette and stared at him. For a few moments we didn't speak, it was too intense to say anything. I looked down at the floor between my legs.

"What about me? I can't take this stress right now, I really can't. The cheaper it is makes it easier on me cause then I don't have to work as much. Sora can handle me however I happen to be, and I don't tihnk you can just yet. I just need some calm right now. I'm about to break," I didn't look up but I heard him shift to sit beside me. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I knew he was still bitter but he under stood what I was saying. He pulled me over so I was leaning against him.

"Okay," He said. We weren't fine, but for the moment it didn't matter. He got what I was saying, and sure it hurt him, but I was hurting too.

I moved out a few days before the start of February. Riku turned out to be a really good roommate. It wasn't until I moved in with him and Sora that I found out he was gay. I laughed and told him he should meet Axel.

"Maybe this time he won't be taking care of your drunken ass," He had joked with me. For two people who didn't like smoke, he and Sora seemed to spend an awful lot of time in my room. By the end of February they were tired of me locking myself up in my room and changed the smoking rule. As long as it wasn't in the bathroom I was allowed to smoke anywhere in the apartment. The three of us worked well together. I was thinking about asking them if Axel could move in with us. I talked to Axel about it and he seemed up for the idea.

A few days before I asked, Axel had told me he found a roommate and was moving out of his Aunt's place. It was one of the other guys we worked with and went to school with. His name was Demyx. He was a funny guy, everyone got along with him. I liked Demyx, he was a good guy. He started hanging around with us more and more.

I remember sometime in April the three of us had went to a house party. Axel was off flirting with someone. I wasn't to clear on who the person was. I was playing pool with Demyx and some other girl we worked with, her name was Namine. She reminded me a lot of Olette but I didn't feel the same way about her. Namine was just a friend. Namine was talking about how her boy friend didn't want to deal with their mutual feeling's, they had been fighting for the past week and currently were not on speaking terms. That's when Demyx opened his big mouth.

"It's kind of how Roxas doesn't want to deal with Axel's feelings hey?" He said trying to make an example. I missed my shot when those words left his mouth.

"What are you talking about?" I turned to Demyx and he shrugged.

"He was kind of hinting that maybe that was the reason you didn't want to move in with him," I shook my head but he continued to talk, "I'm not saying he said it but I kind of get that vibe. He's trying to get past them because he knows you will never feel that way about him. He really doesn't want to lose you though,"

After the party was over Axel spent the night with me. I had brought the situation up and Axel explained it better. He said that it wasn't the main reason but he did think it was a reason. Even I had to admit it was part of it. We talked about it and he told me that he was trying to get over his feelings for me. He told me that I had changed his life and I was too important to him to lose.

I told him he was too important to me to lose over something like this.

_**Let's get moving into Action – Skye SweetNam**_

It was May and prom was coming up in the next few weeks. I didn't have a date since most of the school was certain I was gay by now. It really kind of sucked. I had tried to get up the courage to ask Olette, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. So I gave up, it wasn't like prom was important to me anyways. It was a superficial coming of age event, where everyone got way too dressed up and paid too much money for one stupid night.

But I wanted to be a part of that in a way. I guess I was missing having a stupid teenage life, were I worked to have money as opposed to pay bills. Where I got to do stupid things and my mom was there to make it better. It was still hard to think about her. I was sitting outside on the stairs of the smoking section, waiting for Axel to get out of class so we could go for lunch. After the sound of the bell I got up and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. After a few drags Axel appeared and we walked down the street to get lunch. Halfway through the meal Axel popped a question that made me choke on my food.

"You want me to what?" I sputtered and grabbed my water. I took a drink and waited to see if he was going to say it again.

"I said do you want to go to the prom together, what are you deaf?" He asked. I took a long drink of my water not sure why he was asking me. I looked at Axel for a moment and gulped. He furrowed his eyebrows and stared at me.

"I'm just asking if you want to go, as friends," He clarified. I looked at him for a moment; I had just spent the past week ragging on about how lame prom was. I blinked for a moment and stuffed a few fries into my mouth. He took a sip of his chocolate shake while he waited for my answer. I mulled over my thoughts about it while I finished eating my fries. He had sighed and figured I wasn't going to answer him.

We got up and paid for our food. We both had class in ten minutes so we lit our cigarettes and headed back to the school. He looked at the ground as we walked. For the weather warming up I felt really cold right now. I reached out and grabbed Axel's arm. He stopped and looked at me.

"Let's do it," He raised his eyebrow at me. I smacked him upside the head for the dirty thoughts I knew just ran through his perverted mind. God I swear all he ever thought about back then was sex, specifically, sex with me.

"I meant let's go to prom together. As friends," He smiled and pulled me into a tight hug. I squawked and laughed as we stood there hugging.

As soon as I got home and told Riku and Sora, I was dragged from the apartment kicking and screaming to go shopping. Shopping with those two was a nightmare and a half. They acted like two dotting mothers as opposed to my roommate and my best friend. I hated every moment of this shopping.

The day of prom was a trip to hell in a hand basket. I was dragged out of my bed around noon to start getting ready. Riku had stripped me off my clothes and carried me to the bathroom well I was still half asleep. I woke up as soon as I hit the water. At least it was hot.

"What the hell!" I yelled. Sora walked into the bathroom and looked at the two of us. He started laughing when Riku forced me under the water to get my hair wet. I pouted as soon as he pulled me back up. He washed my hair for me, claiming I couldn't do it right. He let me wash my own body, thank god. After that I was pulled from the tub and I got to dry myself off, lucky me.

I was dragged around the house getting cleaned up all day. Riku said he didn't care that Axel and I were going as just friends; I wasn't going to my prom without looking like I'd walked out of a fashion magazine.

I finally got to see myself ten minutes before Axel was going to show up. Riku had styled my hair in sideways, unruly spikes. I was wearing a pair of black dress pants, with a matching jacket. Riku had helped me fit them right. I had a light blue shirt on and a black tie. I just stared at myself till Axel got there.

Sora and Riku insisted on taking pictures of us, for us, bastards. Axel was wearing basically the same thing as me only he had a red shirt on. He hugged me and smiled, telling me I looked good. I told him the same thing. Riku and Sora made us pose around the apartment and outside. It was a bit embarrassing but we survived it, somehow. We got into the car and burst out into laughter. Now we were ready for prom.

It was exactly what I had expected. Everyone thought we were either stupid fags or terribly cute together. Namine brought her new boy friend, I think his name was Siefer. Demyx brought the new crazy sassy girl we worked with, her name was Larxene. They were funny since they had both drank before arriving. The alcohol kicked in during the speeches. The food sucked ass, so we were going out after the dance to eat.

Speaking of the dance part, I don't think I've ever had that much fun. I danced mostly with Axel, Demyx and Namine. Once everyone else got really tired Larxene pulled me on to the floor and we tore it up. Once everyone else hit their second wind we danced the rest of prom away. I thought about asking 

Olette to dance but before I knew it we were getting kicked out of the hall. After that we headed to the nearest twenty four hour restaurant.

We ate nachos and danced there. The staff didn't mind since we were nicer than the few drunks that were in there with us. Our waitress, Even, danced with us for a bit. I remember grinding with Axel and Demyx thinking that things could only get better from here. Boy was I wrong.

_**Boys of Summer – Don Henley**_

__There were times when I wished my mother was still alive, graduation was one of them. Axel's parents had come in to see him graduate so I had no one to save me from spending a day with my father. Riku and Sora had decided to meet me after the ceremony, to give me some alone time with my family . I was forced into an awkward day of shopping with him and my step mom, then a terrible supper which my grandparents were invited too. He didn't let my aunt's from my mom's side come for supper with us, since they would have spent the whole meal at each other's throats.

The second we made it to the hall I made a dash for the graduate area. I slipped on my gown then made my way to find Axel. It wasn't too hard since our class didn't have to many six foot tall flaming heads. He hugged me tight, and promised to save me a seat since he was walking the stage before me. Axel looked good in his gown where as I looked like a drowned rat. We found Namine and Demyx to do my hair. Demyx always had a comb and some gel stashed in the girl's purse. They sat me down and fixed my hair since I had to be dragged out of bed this morning.

The ceremony was really boring. There were too many speeches, awards and scholarships for me to care about. I remember leaning on Axel's shoulder and making snarky remarks about everything. He laughed even if what I said didn't make sense; I was too bored to really care.

Instead of going to the school planned after grad party we decided to go bowling. There was Axel, Namine, Demyx, Kairi, Luxord, Larxene and myself. Then something strange happened, Olette asked if her and her friends could come with us. That added three more people; her, Hayner and Pence. We played five games and I kicked almost everyone's ass, Larxene was giving me a run for my money though. After that we hit a coffee shop and headed home.

I don't remember much of the summer, it past in a whirl of parties, beaches and slave labour. I hadn't applied for University since I didn't know what I wanted to do yet, so I was stuck working full time for the next year already. Over the summer Axel had started to get over me, which in turn meant he was sleeping around. Namine had broken up with Seifer and was living the single life for once. Demyx was toning down his party ways to focus on his music. Larxene was Larxene as always, we had been hanging out a lot since Axel was spending most of his time hung over or in someone's bed.

I tried to talk to him about it but he simply brushed me off. He told me I didn't understand what he was going through. He talked about how I was making him suffer since I refused to even try with him. I asked him why being friends wasn't good enough and he simply ignored me. I pushed the subject a bit and he told me to fuck off. He gave me some bull shit about how he was in pain and I wasn't there trying 

to help him. Then I yelled at him about the incidents after my mom's death and how he caused me so much pain. I told him he didn't know what suffering was and to fuck off if he was going to use me as an excuse to get drunk and sleaze around.

We didn't talk for two days after that. I simply ignored him at work, Call me petty if you will but I didn't want to deal with him being an asshole. On the third day of operation ignore Axel He came in and handed me a c.d. He said he had been thinking about us and how he was okay with just being friends and explained that he was feeling unwanted for the past few weeks. I hugged him and took the c.d. It was the story of us, he explained. Songs to go with how we met, and were friends and fought through some really tough things.

The strangest thing that happened that summer happened to two people that no one would have expected of considered. One night Axel was hanging out with me at my apartment. Demyx had kicked him out saying something about being a block to his creativity. Later we found out that Demyx had a girl friend and he didn't want us to know at the time, but back to the story at hand.

Riku and Sora were hanging out with us. The four of us were fresh out of money and lacked alcohol. We decided to play some board games. After three games of Monopoly and four games of life Sora broke out the twister. We all played for a bit before I got tired and sat around out. I wasn't using the spinner just calling out colours and body parts. I had Axel under Sora and Riku over both of them. Riku was determined to win since he had lost every game we played tonight. He leand forward and kissed Sora, which caused everyone but him to fall. Game night was over and everyone retreated to their rooms.

A few days later we got hit with our second ton of bricks. Axel and I were smoking at the kitchen table when Riku and Sora came home. Instead of scolding me they looked a bit nervous.

"Look we got something to tell you," Riku had started but then Sora launched out, not able to contain himself.

"We've been dating for the past three months," My brunette best friend blurted. I almost choked on my cigarette. Axel actually fell out of the chair he was half sitting on. There were a few moments of silence before anyone said anything. Of course it was Axel.

"That really hurt my ass," He referred to his fall. Thus the Riku Sora relationship was ousted. They were cute together, which put a bit of pressure on me and Axel again. I think seeing them ate made him feel like he was being cheated out of something really good by me. I felt bad for Axel, but I wasn't going to pity date him.

Nothing else really exciting happened that summer. We did our thing and had a lot of fun. With the turning of summer to fall, Axel and I headed into our second year of friendship. This is where our story really starts. We were about to hit more hardships, betrayal and fights than we were ready for. Something in my gut had told me so. It was an unpleasant feeling and scared me a bit.


	2. Coffee And Training

Title: May Cause Cancer

Story Summary: So here we are, like every other day of our lives. Slaving at work and putting up with pretentious customers, lusting after people and making stupid decisions. I'm all work and little play. But he's all play and little work

Chapter Two: Coffee and Training

Chapter Summary: "Hey Rox! See you met the new kid," I roll my eyes and yawn. Namine giggles a bit more and reaches for my cigarette. I pass it to her and she takes a drag.

Rating: M just incase

Warnings: Language, Sexual themes, Slight Violence, partial Nudity, AU

Notes: I do not own Kingdom hearts. I simply borrowed the characters for this. Still looking for a Beta Reader if anyone is interested. Thanks to everyone would either left a review or added this to their favourites! It means a lot to me!

After the CD stopped playing Sora and I got very restless. We squirmed around a bit trying to get comfortable again. With no luck we grabbed our laptops and headed to the living room. The thing about our apartment was in the summer it was ungodly hot, So hot you could hardly stand it. We had dark sheets and towels draped over all the window's trying to keep the sun and the heat out, which helped a little bit. We lie down on the couch and complain for a bit before deciding to do something about it.

"We could take a cold bath!" Sora said. I shook my head, knowing that we would never get out of the tub by the time Riku got home to find us. He tapped his chin and thought again.

"We could stand in the open fridge," I shook my head again.

"Sora, Riku would kill me if the power bill was super high because of that," Riku would only scold Sora, but the silver haired freak would skin me alive and roast me afterwards. If I was lucky I'd die by the time he started to pull my insides out. He really hated having high bills.

"We could go get ice cream," It was a good idea but after thinking for a moment we both groaned. Neither of us wanted to go out in the heat to get the ice cream. We sat in silence for a few more moments before I thought of a wonderful idea.

"Sora! Axel is coming to visit after work!" I exclaimed. He gave me a look that said 'Duh I know that.' I slap him in the forehead as I have an excellent thought.

"Axel gets off of work in fifteen minutes." Again I got the same look. I smacked myself in the forehead; it was like the heat got in the way of our reading each others thoughts.I started to talk again, but really slow, just in case his brain was starting to melt.

"If we call Axel, he can bring us ice cream or slushies," I smiled. Sora smacked himself in the forehead really hard. I laughed and he reached behind him to grab the phone. He past the phone to me and I gave him a funny look.

"Axel's all yours, lord knows you could sweet talk him into anything," I went to tell Sora off but he put a hand over my mouth and dialed the store's number.

Axel and I worked at Lolita's Cafe, despite the name it was a sweet indie coffee shop that was taking over the world one store at a time. Axel had recently been promoted to supervisor, and since I ran the night shift, he mostly worked days, we also got different days off and we changed our shifts around a lot. Our boss didn't mind too much.

"Lolita's Cafe, could you call back never?" Axel's voice answered the phone. Clearly he was not having a good day. That meant my friend really needed some sugar.

"Axel baby! Are you still coming over after work, because I'm really excited to see you!" I hear him groan, cover the phone to yell at someone. I think we had a new person start today, I don't really remember but I'll find out tomorrow.

"Yeah Rox, I'm coming over, fuck! Demyx stay where I put you! The new kid doesn't know how to work that yet!" I pulled the phone away from my ear. Hopefully Larxene would get there soon so he could leave early. Even though Demyx and Axel are great friends, Demyx never listened to Axel. He didn't listen to Axel just to spite him.

"I wish it was pay day," My favourite red head moaned into the phone. With a swish of doors I knew he'd walked into the kitchen to check on the baker. Mostly likely he was just trying to escape working.

"Me too. Can you do me a favour on your way over? The apartment is really hot and the A/C broke down again. Can you grab some ice cream? Or slushies?" I bit my lip and waited for him to respond, Sora looked like he was ready to break in two if Axel said no.

"Sea salt, Right?" He laughed, "Yeah I'll save you from the heat Sugar, I gotta go, Larxene'll skin me if I don't have the scones out when she gets here," I laughed and we said good bye to each other, with lots of fake kisses coming from Axel's end. I hung up on him and threw the phone at Sora.

For the next twenty minutes the apartment was quiet. We sat there counting the minutes until Axel arrived with the delicious frozen treats that would save us from this heat. We moved to the kitchen floor and found the tile to be nice and cool. Sora bitched about how the landlord never got anything fixed in the stupid complex and how we needed to buy fans for the apartment. I agreed since I was way too hot to argue with him.

After twenty minutes of on going suffering Axel finally buzzed our apartment. We let him up and unlocked the door. It wasn't like we lived in a bad neighbourhood; the three of us just had this compulsive need to keep the door locked at all times. Sora couldn't wait for Axel to get up here so he 

ran out of the apartment to find the red head. I resumed the lazy spot of holding the kitchen floor down. Few a more minutes Sora and Axel came tumbling through the door. The little brunette had jumped on Axel's back and made him carry him back to the apartment. I shook my head and waited for Axel to bring me something cold and sweet. Sora went bounding into his room to call Riku and Axel sat down on the floor beside me. He was still in his work clothes which consisted of black dress pants, a white collared shirt and a black apron. Since we were supervisor's we also had to wear a black tie. His was hanging loose on his neck and he had opted for a white button up tee-shirt.

"Sugar for my Roxie," Axel put the slushies down beside me and handed me a bar of ice cream. I unwrapped it and stuck the ice cream in my mouth. I looked over at Axel and smiled. He smiled back before taking of his apron; He pulled his tie off and started to unbutton his shirt. He turned and looked at me his voice all husky and lust filled in his eyes.

"Like what you see?" I blink a few times and pulled the ice cream out of my mouth.

"What did you just say to me?"I quirk an eyebrow at the red head. Really what was he thinking.

"I said, You don't look so good." He grabbed my shoulder with one hand and set the other on my forehead. His hand felt cool against my skin. We sat there for a few moments before he called Sora. The brunette came out of his room and walked over to us. He wasn't looking so good either. He was still on the phone with Riku.

"What is it?" He laid down on the floor beside me, kind of out of it. Axel snatched the phone from Sora causing him to whine a lot. I put my hands over my ears and yelled at Sora to shut up. Axel shook his head and turned away from us.

"I'm pretty sure they just have heat stroke but their getting pretty strange," He nodded and listened to the phone for a moment. "Okay, I'll see you soon," He turned the phone off and turned to look at us. We smiled back at him not sure what he had planned for us. He walked over and snatched the ice cream from our hands. We both cried out as he walked over and threw them into the garbage. He turned back to us and smiled.

"Okay boys strip," We both looked at him like he was crazy for a moment. I didn't dare to ask if we had heard right.

"You want us to what now?" Apparently Sora dared to ask. Axel walked over and grabbed the bottom of my muscle shirt and pulled it off of me. I squawked and he smiled at us.

"Don't make me do the rest," He smirked at us and we removed the rest of our clothes save for our boxers. Axel had left the room, which was still ungodly hot. I ran a hand through my sweaty hair and looked over at Sora. He shrugged at me; neither of us knew what was going on. Axel came back to the kitchen where we still sat on the floor.

"Both of you, into the bathroom," We gave him a strange look and looked to each other. We got up and headed towards the bathroom. Axel followed in behind us. He gave me a soft push and I figured 

he wanted us to get in. I took Sora's hand and pulled him towards the tub. We didn't bother to take off our boxers as we climbed into the tub. It was cold, but I figured it was probably just because we were so hot. Axel nodded at us and smiled a bit.

"Now you two stay there till I come and get you, okay?" Axel said and headed out of the bathroom. Sora looked at me and shivered. We shifted and splashed around a bit so we were laying down beside each other. He smiled at me and we laid there in silence. Neither of us wanted to talk, and as time passed the water didn't feel as cold. We didn't know how much time had past, but I knew I was starting to feel better.

"You two look comfortable," We looked up and saw Riku standing in the doorway, "Oh and Axel says it's time to get out," I groaned and climbed over Sora to get out of the tub. I noted that Riku had only one towel in his hands. I walked past him and headed to my bedroom. I walked in to the room and saw Axel laying on my bed. I walked over to my bed and he sat up. He was laying on a towel and passed it to me.

I wrapped the towel around myself and grabbed a pair of boxers. I pulled them on then put on a pair of shorts and a muscle shirt. It wasn't until Axel wrapped his arms around that me noticed I was shaking. He pulled the towel off of me and laughed lightly. Axel walked me over to the bed and he laid us down. I blinked at him a bit and he covered us up with a sheet.

"Don't scare me like that again okay Rox?" I rolled over and blinked at him a few times. He looks a bit worried but I can't really tell, I'm really tired. I nod and he pulled me a bit closer to him.

--

Two days after I got my lovely case of heat stroke and I feel like I'm going to get it again. Why one might ask? Well it's seven in the morning and it's already hot outside, making it hot as hell in the bakery part of our lovely little coffee shop. I sigh and pull a batch of muffins from the oven. I put them down and load in the next batch.

Why I always got stuck with opening is beyond me. Our Manager Xemnas knows that I am the anti-morning person. He knows I'd rather cut my foot of then be up at six in the morning baking. At least I get to be in the kitchen all day. A cranky Roxas is not allowed to serve customers.

I looked down at my watch, there is about fifteen minutes to open and everything is already to go. I smile and grab my cigarettes off the desk. All the management members have a place for their things on, above or underneath the desk. I open the back door of the store and step outside. It is considerably cooler now that I've been stuck in the kitchen for an hour. I sit down on a milk crate beside the door and light my cigarette.

I take a drag and close my eyes. Thank god Axel is working today, that will put me in a better mood for when I have to meet the trainee. It isn't often that we get a new person who ends up staying 

past probation, much less one Axel will think will make it. I hear foot steps and look up, expecting Axel, but it's some crazy blue haired kid who is walking towards me. Great, so not in the mood for people yet.

"You Roxas?" He asks. I nod and look up at him. He offers a weak smile and I take a drag off of my cigarette. He sits down on one of the crates beside me. He must be the new kid, we tell them they can't be in the store without a manager there, so we make them sit outside a lot. I look over at him and hold my cigarettes.

"Word of warning, if I'm opening then don't talk to me when you first get here. Have a cigarette," I say and smile half assed. If Axel thinks he's going to last then he might as well know I'm not a happy morning person. He takes my pack and gives me a soft smile again. He lights the cigarette and takes a drag.

"Sorry, Axel told me you were a really talkative person," Oh well now I know who to beat for that. I shrug and take another drag of my cigarette, I can feel my body waking up from the nicotine, it's so nice. I run a hand through my hair and stand up. Within two seconds I feel a bone crushing grip around my torso. There is a face rubbed between my shoulder blades.

"Rox! I'm so glad your feeling better!" I hear Namine's squeal. She reaches up and drags her hands through my hair. She laughs a bit and cuddles in closer to me. I go to complain but I feel her get peeled off of me. I hear Demyx laugh and turn around to see Demyx holding on to a laughing Namine. He smiles and they both wave at us.

"Hey Rox! See you met the new kid," I roll my eyes and yawn. Namine giggles a bit more and reaches for my cigarette. I pass it to her and she takes a drag.

"You don't want to quit on us now do you Zexion?" I turn and look at him. I just know that Axel and Demyx are going to shorten that name and make everyone call him that. Hope he doesn't bite their heads off about it, that only makes them worse. He seems to have quieted down and gotten shy. These crazy people are going to eat this kid alive. He runs a hand through his hair and looks past all of us. I take a glance over my shoulder and see Axel running towards us.

"Roxie! I missed you!" He ran right at me and jumped on me. I push at Axel's face as he tries to kiss me and I can hear Namine and Demyx laughing at me. He puts his lit cigarette to my lips and I latch on to it. I take a long drag and let the red head smooch my cheek. I look at the new kid who looks kind of sad now.

"Every fricken morning Axel! And you just saw me yesterday," He lets go of me and waves his hand. I totally kept his cigarette. He looks over at Zexion and smiles.

"Morning Zex! Was Roxie friendly this morning?" He laughed. I shoot my red head friend a dirty look and check the time on my cell phone. Namine latches on to me and leans over my shoulder. She smiles and gives me a hug.

"Okay guys, time to open. Get inside and clock in," I turn to the Zexion and gave him a small smirk. "You're in the kitchen with me today," He looks like wants to protest but I toss the cigarette and head into the kitchen. Axel puts his hand on my shoulder and smiles.

"Take it easy on the kid okay?" I nod and hang my sweater up on a hook. I grab my apron off of the counter where I threw it this morning and sigh. I'm not in the mood to dick around with a trainee all day. He doesn't seem like he's in the mood to put up with me either. With a soft sigh I motion for Zexion to come over and I explain the kitchen set up and how everything works. Unlike some coffee shops, we don't use pre-made mixtures. It's part of the charm. That also means you spend most of your day mixing batters and opening burning hot ovens, not a pleasant feeling in summer. Zexion was quiet while I explained, he made me a bit nervous, but it wasn't something I couldn't deal with.

"Morning rush is over," Axel marched into the back and slung his arm around my shoulders. He passed me his water bottle then gave one to Zexion. I took a drink and smiled up at him.

"You know what we should do?"

"How about not updating sales. I hate that crap," I laugh and pulled Axel over to the computer with me. I sit down in the chair and get to work. After morning rush we are dead until about noon, then there is a steady stream of customers till about eight at night. We update our sales books quickly, since this is when we do catch up and prep work. Demyx appears out of nowhere and pops between us.

"Espresso machine is spitting again Ax," The red head groans and get up. I know he's not going to come back soon; the espresso machine is a bitch to fix. I l finish up with my paper work and get up. With a nod I set the two of us in the kitchen to do the work.

We work till about eleven thirty and we are finally finished. The blue haired boy looks tired. I put my hand on his shoulder and smile. I motion for him to come outside with me. We go out and sit down on the milk crates again.

"You did good for your first day in the kitchen, you should be proud."

He blinks at me and I light a cigarette, I pass him my pack and take a drag. We smoked in silence before heading back inside. The rest of my shift past quietly and I didn't know if I should be thankful or not. Zexion didn't seem to like me very much; it didn't really matter to me. With a half hour to go Axel came back into the kitchen. He took over my job baking and I sat down to do the day's worth of paper work.

"What are you doing? Get that flour away from me! AXEL!" I turn and look up to see Axel rubbing his flour covered hands on Zexion and in his hair. The boy who seemed cold and distance to me looks like he's having fun. He looked a bit upset with Axel though it seemed kind of fake. I shook my head and went back to the paper work. After shifting it around a bit I noticed there was more paper then there should have been. A lot more. I grinded my teeth and sighed.

"Axel!" I turned the desk chair around and snapped at my red head who was unfortunately my best friend. He stopped with his hands buried deep into Zexion's hair and a mess of flour on both of them and the floor. He gave me a sheepish grin, he so knew he was in trouble.

"Yes Muffin?" He asked. I glared at him and he laughed nervously. This was like back in high school when he would skip out on his homework then borrow all my laboured work and copy it. I threw my pen at Axel who ducked and laughed.

"Get over here and do your own damn paper work!" I grabbed another pen and tossed it at him again. He was going to run and hide till I ran out of pens; our boss was cheap so it wouldn't take me that long. After I'd thrown every pen but one I crossed my arms and waited for him to come back. After a few more moments of hiding the red head started to pick up the pens. Zexion gave me a dirty look; I guess I spoiled his fun. The red head plopped down in the chair beside me. He pouted and moaned a bit. God why was I such a sucker for him being pouty?

"I'll help so that we can get it done quickly," He leaned forward and we worked on his paper work. After about fifteen minutes we finished the work and I got up. It was time for me to leave. Axel ran a hand through his hair and looked at me. He smiled and stood up as well.

"I'll come over after I'm finished here okay?" I nodded and smiled at the red head.

"Just remember that Xemnas is coming back next week, so we better keep up on the paper work or he'll have kittens," I hung up my apron and grabbed my bag. It has a change of clothes in it so I don't die on the walk home.

"Or he will really make us eat glass this time," Axel laughs and so do I. Zexion looked confused, which is understandable. It was something that had happened about six months ago. We dropped a box of cups we sold and they all broke. Xemnas had been so mad that he threatened to make us eat the broken cups just to get his money's worth. Of course we ended up working two shifts without pay to make up for it.

I walked over to the staff bathroom and changed out of my work clothes into a pair of blue plaid shorts and a black muscle shirt. I run a hand through my hair and threw my work clothes into my bag. I switch my black work runners for a pair of flip flops before heading out of the bathroom. I head back into the kitchen and give Axel a wave. He smiled and walked over to me. He stopped me in my tracks and walked around me in a circle. Namine and Demyx were peeking in the back and watching us. Zexion was watching with a great a deal of interest. After he circled me a couple of times he stopped behind me and put his hands on my hips. He pulled me backwards and thrusted in to my hips.

"AXEL!"

"Like I keep telling you Rox, you'd be a perfect fag. You look the part and you're the right height for being pushed against the wall for someone to..."

"FUCK!"

We all turn and look at Zexion. He has his eyes closed tightly and is holding his hand to his chest. I push Axel off of me and rush over to Zexion. I grab him and pull him over to the sink. I turn the water on luke warm and grab on to the wrist of the hand he is cradling to his chest. I pull his hand and he let's me. I stick it under the water and I feel him jerk to pull it out.

"Zex you have to keep your hand under there. Namine, Demyx get back up front. Axel stop gaping and ge thet first aid kit," Everyone stands still for a moment before doing what I tell them. I let go of Zexion's wrist and he keeps his hand under the water, but I can tell he wants to pull it out. I jump onto the counter, not really knowing what to say. If it wasn't a new person I would have been able to talk to them easily.

"Sorry," He said and kept his head down. I lift up my arm and show him my scar on the back of my forearm.

"I just did this about two months ago. You only got a first degree burn, mine was a third degree. I had to go to the hospital and everything," He looks up at my burn and frowns.

"Why are you telling me this?" He asks and I put my hands behind my head. He must think I'm trying to play down his injury, make him seem like a wussy. I smile a bit though his gaze is very unnerving. I didn't understand why he only seemed to look at me like that.

"I'm just saying it happens to the best of us. Even Axel has a few good ones. I know it hurts but we'll take care of you," I smile and Larxene walks into the kitchen. She walked over to us and took a look at me then at Zexion's hand.

"Burn victim?" Axel came back to me and past me the first aid kit. Larxene flipped her hair out of her face. The girl had stopped doing her hair when she came to work so now it just kind of hung nicely around her face. She looked a lot less intimidating like this. I opened the first aid kit and grabbed out the burn cream and some gauze. Larxene shut off the water and grabbed some paper towel to dry off Zexion's hand. She could be really gentle when she wanted to be.

"Well let's take care of this and then you two can get out of here for the day," I open the burn cream and gently rub it on the burn. He nods a bit and runs a hand through his hair. After I finish rubbing the cream on his hand I gauze it up tightly, but not to tight. I jump off the counter and re-pack the first aid kit. Zexion is standing beside me and waiting for me to finish. Larxene pats me on the shoulder and looks over at Zexion.

"Alright boys head home," She smiles before turning to yell out to the front counter, "Axel get your ass back into the kitchen!" She stomps of to change and clock in. I wave at Zexion and head to put the first aid kit away.

"You need a ride home?" He asks. I turn and shake my head. I could use one but there is just something about him that makes me not want one.

"I'm fine with walking I live close by," I say and throw my bag over my shoulder, "I'll see you tomorrow," I smile and head out. The walk home is uneventful; I listen to my MP3 player as I walk home. For some reason I feel uneasy. I used to watch people walk by and wander the same patterns every day. I watched them live their plain, boring, more than monotonous lives and laugh. That was never going to be me that was something I was certain I wasn't going to do. I had to much for myself, I was too extraodinary to live that kind of life. Now here I was an extraodinary person living an extremely boring life.

I walk into our apartment and flopped down on the couch. I moan a bit and leave my bag beside the couch. I curl up and start to fall asleep, if only just to get rid of these thoughts.

The next two weeks pass in a blur of parties and work. My feeling of uneasiness has past. Xemnas came back to work and was quite pleased that we had kept the place together so well. As a reward he decided to close the store take us all on a picnic. The only catch was we all had to make our own food, and drive out to the place. I had to get up at seven in the morning to make my dish for the picnic. It took me an hour to get ready, and then I waited for Axel to show up. He got there about twenty minutes after I had finished. He looked just as tired as I felt.

"So what did you make?" He asked and I showed him the crappy salad I threw together. He smiled.

"Looks good. So what did I make?" I lift up a container of fruit. He nods and I close my eyes while we drive. I listen to his techno music playing quietly. It's an unspoken peace with us. We are quite content, well at least I am. I don't know about Axel. Axel puts his arm around my shoulders and pulls me over to him. I look up at him and he laughs.

"You'll hurt your head if you keep leaning against the window," I nodded and kept my head on his shoulder. I closed my eyes; Axel knew I would fall asleep since I wasn't a morning person.

I woke up about twenty minutes and found us parked. Axel was humming a song and playing with my hair. This was nice, but I knew I had to put a stop to this. I yawned and sat up. Axel smiled and got out of the car. I got out and shielded my eyes from the sun. I put on my sunglasses and grabbed the food from the car.

"Have a nice nap?" The red head puts his hand on my shoulder and slings our bag over his shoulder. I swat his hand away and groan. I hate the sun, and I hate summer even more. With a scowl on my face we head over to Xemnas and the rest of the group. Axel draped his arms around my shoulders as we walked over to the others.

"Namine looks hung over. Demyx brought his guitar, Larxene is sleeping in the grass, Xemnas is reading and so is Zexion. This will be fun," Axel laughed and squeezed my shoulder. He led us over to the blanket and we sat down. After a few seconds I flopped down and set my head in his lap. He moved his hand to my hair and softly played with it. No one really seemed to notice us arriving which was okay. I sat there for a bit and closed my eyes. I felt myself starting to fall asleep when other people finally 

noticed us. Everyone started talking and I opened my eyes. I looked around and caught Zexion looking at me. He glared at me a bit then went back to his conversation with Axel. He smiled softly while he talked to Axel. I was starting to get the feeling that he only didn't like me because Axel did. For some reason that really bothered me. I was going to say something but Larxene crawled over to me and pulled me off of Axel's lap and on to the grass beside her.

"You're going to be my pillow because you won't be mean to me," I nodded and put my sweater under my head. Within a few we had both fallen asleep.

"Get up sleepy heads!"Axel shouted as he jumped on top of both of us. I made this weird squawking noise and Larxene hissed at him. We were both very displeased to be woken up from our nap, we were the two people who loved sleeping. Larxene pounced at Axel and slammed him into the ground. He hit the ground with a thump and a yelled at the skinny girl on top of him. As I sat up I laughed at my best friend who only pouted.

"Now that we are all awake it's time for lunch,"Xemnas said and there was a loud cheer from Demyx and Namine. Apparently the blonde girl wasn't feeling as hung over any more. I helped myself to a bit of salad, fruit and a bit of everything that had been brought. I didn't really talk to anyone as I ate but I listened to everyone chat. It was nice, all of us just siting around and hanging out instead of being at eachother's throats at work. I had a soft smile on my face while I listened to Namine and Demyx talk about their night of partying last night. I didn't notice my best friend sit behind me until he wrapped his arms around me and cuddled into the nape of my neck.

"Are they sleeping together yet?"I heard Demyx whisper quite loudly to Namine. She giggled and jabbed him in the side with her elbow. I choked on my juice and saw Zexion shift awkwardly out of the side of my eye. What was wrong with him?

"Nah Roxas doesn't know the meaning of putting out," The red head behind me piped up. I gave him a scowl over my shoulder and he laughed, his deep rich laughter right in my ear. With my free hand I reached to slap him but he grabbed my hand and kissed me on the cheek. Namine aww'ed, Demyx cat called and Larxene gagged. She grabbed a frisbee and stood up.

"Who wants to play?" She asked. I wiggled out of Axel's arms and headed over to her. Everyone except for Zexion got up and walked over to me and her. Axel looked over his shoulder before turning around and heading back to Zexion. He pulled the boy to his feet and pulled him over to the rest of us.

"Okay we are playing on teams, whoever gets Roxas gets one les person. Xemnas and me get to be team leaders," Larxene decided for us.

"That's not fair!" Called Namine.

"Why do you get to be a team leader?" Squawked Axel.

"My Frisbee, My rules" She laughed and motioned for Xemnas tocome over so that they could Rock, Paper, Scissors for first pick. Larxene won the best two out of three and instantly picked me for 

her team. Xemnas tapped his chin for a second before picking Namine. Larxene scooped up Axel for our team of three. So it was me, Axel and Larxene versus Xemnas, Namine, Demyx and Zexion. We set up the goal lines using our sweaters and the blanket before getting down to playing.

Did I mention that the only sport I'm good at is Ultimate Frisbee? I'm not particularly good at running or throwing, but when it comes to Frisbee I am awesome. With Larxene being a good sprinter and Axel's height for blocking this was going to be an easy game., even if we were going to playfor the next three hours.

We all had a blast playing. For the first bit of the game Zexion seemed reluctant to play but after a bit of hassling from Axel he got into the spirit. He was good too, for being only a few inches taller than me he was giving Axel a run for his money everytime we passed to him. Demyx tried his hardest to keep up with Larxene but it was really no use. No one really understood how she was in such good shape and smoked as much as the rest of us. Namine and Xemnas both tried to cover me but I could slip in and out of them with ease.

The last ten minutes of the game were intense. If we even thought about passing to Axel, Zexion was there to tackle him to the ground. Namine had left me to hel p Demyx cover Larxene and Xemnas was trying to bribe me with days off with pay to fumble. In the end though, as hot sweaty and tired as we were we ending up winning. After a few minutes of rest we decided it was time to go and packed our stuff back up. Larxene had already assumed that she was getting a ride with us, since Namine and Demyx were going to go and party again tonight. As we headed to the car Zexion ran over to us grabbed on to Axel's arm.

"Can I get a ride home? I came with Demyx and Namine and they have plans already," Axel smiled and nodded, motioning towards the car. Larxene tossed her arm around my shoulder and leaned on me.

"Let's sleep in the back seat on the way home," I whole heatedly agreed with the girl, I was tired, physical activity was not my speciality. We slept the whole way back into the city and Axel dropped me off first. I headed into my apartment and talked with Sora and Riku before taking a shower, changing and going to help Riku make supper. As we were sitting down to eat someone knocked on our apartment door. Riku opened it only to be pushed aside.

"Hey!" He yelled and I got tackled to the ground. I looked over my shoulder and saw Axel on top of me. He gave me a few kisses before getting off of me and pulling me back to my feet.

"I know why Zexion doesn't like you!"

"Huh?" Was all I could say. I didn't know that he didn't like me, just that he seemed edgy around me.

"Zexion doesn't like you cause your my best friend!" He proclaimed and squeezed my cheeks. I slapped his hands and pushed my still damp hair from my face.

"Again, Huh?"

"Zexion wants to do the horizontal tango with me, but feels you're in the way so he doesn't like you!" I slapped my hand to his face as he made his way forward to grab me and kiss me again. He whined a bit and batted my hand out of his way. He grabbed on to my shoulders and smirked.

"You want to know what he did to me before he said all this and got out of my car?" I shook my head but knew the red head wasn't going to listen. He should have been the dumb blonde, not me. He pulled me close and pressed his lips on mine. I wiggled for a second and tried to pull away when he slipped his tongue into my mouth. It took me a few seconds to react, but when I did I put my hands on his face and pushed him off.

"Axel!" He laughed and ruffled my hair before sitting down at the table. Riku looked a bit upset that he hadn't apologised for pushing him out of the way but shrugged it off. The four of us sat down and ate supper quietly. I think Sora was in shock that Axel had just molested my mouth with his, Riku was still stewing in his anger softly and I was thinking about what Axel had said before he kissed me. So Zexion liked Axel, well why would that mean me and him couldn't be friends. After all I didn't like Axel like that but at the same time there were still feelings on the red heads side of our relationship. If it was Axel's feelings for me that were getting in Zexion's way why was he mad at me? I didn'thave control over what Axel felt, I couldn't really.

After supper I headed out to the balcony to smoke, while Sora and Axel did the dishes. I had barely lit my cigarette when my silver haired roommate slipped out onto the deck as well. He sat down with me and he smiled softly.

"So how was kissing Axel?" He asked in that curious teasing tone that he often had whenever he asked about me and Axel. I frowned and put my hands behind my head. I took a long drag of my cigarette and thought about how to answer that.

"All I could really think was that I'm going to stab him in his sleep tonight. But if it was with a girl, say Olette or someone, it would have been nice," Riku laughed and tucked his hands behind his head as well. He looked over at me and sighed.

"Look Rox, I know your straight but really you've never tried anything with a guy. Just like Sora and Axel have never been with girls. I have and I know I just don't like it But really I think all of you should at least try it before you knock it," He leaned over to my ear and whispered in a husky voice, "If you don't want to try with Axel then we can fool around," He laughed a bit and I pretended to slap him.

"Why Riku! You want me to help you cheat on my best friend! We can't be having any of that. Don't gimme no lines,"

"And keep my hands to myself. I know Rox. The only reason you know that song is cause I made you listen to it," I pout and he pinches my cheeks. After a few seconds he lets go and smiles at me. I'm glad he came out here and teased me. If he hadn't I might have thought way too much Axel kissing me. 

He ruffled my hair before starting the complain about how I never did my hair. I snickered a bit as he carried on and on about what I could do with my hair.

"Come Roxas the boys will be all over you. Maybe you'll get some action,"

I gave him a soft smack in his face before standing up. We headed back inside and sat down on the couch waiting for Axel and Sora to finish the dishes. I turned on the T.V and switched it to some Criminal Drama. We watched that until Axel and Sora wandered in and turned the Play Station 2 on. They popped in Soul Calibur and started to play. It took Riku and I about ten seconds to decide that we wanted to be in on this as well. So the four of us wiggled our way on to the couch and started to play.

After about two hours of slapping, kicking, biting and playing videos games we decided to go to bed. Neither Axel nor I had to work tomorrow until something went wrong. The red head grabbed my hand and pulled me back towards my room. I took my sweater off and tossed it on the floor before flopping down on the bed. Axel laid down beside me and wrapped his arm around me. He pulled me closer to him and I wiggled away from him a bit. He grabbed me around the waist and pulled me closer again. I rolled as he pulled me and the red head ended up spooning against me.

"Axel..."

"Roxas, listen" I went to say something but he put his hand over my mouth, "Listen. About the kiss- I'm sorry, I know it makes you feel weird. But this stuff with Zexion is freaking me out. No one's ever liked me before so I don't know what to do," He sighed and dug his face into the crook of my neck. In all honesty Axel's cuddling never really bothered me, after all he had been the one comforting me when my mom had died. I sighed a bit and thought about what to say to the other.

"Well do you like him?" I asked.

"I like you Roxas," He said as a matter of fact. I turned over and Axel smiled. I know what he wanted to hear but I wasn't going to say it. After al it would only hurt him more. Axel pulled me closer and I sighed at Axel. He kissed my neck and ran a hand down my back. I frowned and he pressed up against me.

"Axel look, you know I'm flattered and all but, you know that I just don't think of you like that," He frowned and kept his arms around me. He looked a bit confused and hurt. I knew I probably should have put some space between us but I couldn't after I looked at his face.

"I know just this thing with Zex is kind of throwing me off of my game. Like I know how I feel about you. That's real for me, but what if Zex's feeling are just fleeting? What if I'm not good enough for anyone?" I frown at the other again and give him a small slap on the face. He quirks an eyebrow at me and I shake my head at him.

"Don't you ever think like that. Any guy would be lucky to have you. You know if I was gay I'd be more than happy to be with you. I love you Axel, but I'm not in love with you. Someone is going to see these great qualities in you that I do and they are going to want to be with you, to be in lovewith you. 

Maybe Zexion is one of those people, maybe not. I don't really know what to say,"Axel hugs me closer and I smile a bit.

"Can I just pretend tonight that your mine? I won't do anything funny, I just want to hold you," I don't even have to think about my response, after all the past year has been hard on him and his feelings. Especially when I needed him to comfort me when my mother died.

"Of course,"


End file.
